Season of Seclusion ~ 2021

God has been nudging me about the subject of seclusion for, well, over a year now.

I have felt overwhelmed, overbooked, and overextended for quite some time now. Actually, it's been my M.O. for most of my life.

God recently reminded me of a time within the last decade when I moved out of state and I had detoxed from all of the things that were filling my schedule, with barely any margin.

...My calendar seriously ran my life. And it wasn’t as if there were a ton of payoffs! I wasn’t making a ton of money, or getting grand promotions, just constantly busy and connecting with others. When I moved away I remember experiencing a ton of anxiety because of the change in my schedule. Every minute wasn’t accounted for - and it drove me crazy for a while. NOT being busy, gave me anxiety.

Looking back, that was just one example God has reminded me of recently, I was in desperate need of rest. So much so, that didn’t even really know how to rest! That season was quite a journey, let me tell ya!

I could write a novel on the things God has showed me through the years (some things came easier than others), but in the area of rest, this is one that I have been the most dense about.

Recently, through a series of events in which I am choosing to hold close to my heart, God has made it abundantly clear that He is calling me to a time of solitude. My soul is in desperate need of nourishment; spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

In my field of work it is so easy to carry on helping, helping, helping, until the helper is burnt out. Some of this is my choice, as I’ve gone into business for myself, got hitched, and have some lovely friends, colleagues, mentees, and family I also give my time and energy to. However, that is how subtly the lie has crept in again, leading me to believe that I have to keep burning the candle at both ends; responding to others as quickly as I possibly can when I receive an email, text message, or phone call, saying yes to every request, pushing my calendar a little farther so there is barely any white space, and all the while, wondering why I am utterly exhausted and not experiencing the quality of life I am so often encouraging my clients to find.

Please don't misunderstand me, I LOVE my time with friends, but I need to stop the cycle of having at least one weekly social commitment for, well, so long that I've lost count!

Regarding work, I love my job and am honored to work with my clients, I don’t want to resent it. But it is a priority if I wanna keep the lights on and the food in the fridge. I love my husband, but I don’t want to resent him for needing me to go the extra mile to make our house a home, or rub his back when he’s in pain. Therefore, something’s gotta give.

I am FINALLY heeding the call from God to clear my schedule, and get alone with him to become more rested, renewed, aware, and healed. For how long? Good question! I’m sensing for seven weeks upon my return from vacation (which will be somewhat busy, and partially restful). This will bring me into July. I will continue to seek God on when to lift this season of solitude, but I have no doubt he’ll show me! For those of you who are eager to get together, stay tuned!

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Please pray for me as I enter into this season of rest and refocus...I’ve resisted it for a LONG time, and can't do it anymore. I've been called into similar seasons like this in the past, but it has been almost a decade since the last time I've done something like this.

I sense this will be a time for healing, deeper intimacy with The Father, Jesus, and The Holy Spirit.

I need a renewal, like a HUGE one! And I know I’m on the verge of it!

Please don’t take this personally, or be concerned that I am isolating. That is definitely not my intent. Just know that if I take more than a few days to answer texts, calls, or emails, it’s because I’ve slowed down -- way down.

I have to prioritize the “best” choices, over the “good” choices.

What does this mean for my people: I won’t be accepting any social invitations for a while, but please feel free to txt and email, and even snail mail (for those of you who still use that!) to check in and keep in touch.

I do ask that you don’t forget about me while I’m somewhat out of touch.

I know I’ve worked hard at creating a community of loved ones around me, and I don’t ever want to take that for granted. But I'm in a very different season right now, and I know God will show me how to find balance between being a business owner, helper, wife, and co-laborer with Him. Please keep me on your radar (especially for big things - I don’t wanna miss a wedding invitation, or baby shower invite, etc.). Gosh, feel free to still keep me updated on life, prayer requests, etc. I am not cutting off communication, just limiting the type, and the amount.

God has made it so clear that I need to slow down, and make much more needed time for Him, as my soul is desperate as I work through some deeper levels of healing and prioritizing.

Know that the purpose of this post is to keep my loved ones in the loop of my life. Even though this is, "See ya soon." It's obviously not, "Goodbye."

Love to all and thank you for taking the time to read this!

<3 MB Vandenbergh :)